Thursday 2 May 2013

Dealing With Physical Abuse

Wisdom nuggets: Anyone entrusted with power will abuse it if not also animated with the love of truth and virtue, no matter whether he be a prince, or one of the people.
                                                                                                          - Jean de La Fontaine

Source: Photopin


Physical abuse is an act of another party involving contact intended to cause feelings of physical pain, injury, or other physical suffering or bodily harm. Physical abuse is often the most visible form of abuse. This kind of abuse involves beating, hitting, shaking, burning, choking, cutting, throwing, whipping, and other actions that cause physical pain to the victim. Physical abuse will often leave scars or bruises on the body which can be very embarrassing for the victim. This kind of abuse is more common than most people realize. People are being abused in their offices by their bosses, at school by bullies, in the hospitals by health workers, at home by spouses, parents and siblings. Most people physically-abused people keep quiet about their experience and think it's their fault. They hide their bruises and tell lies to cover for their perpetrators. Wives want to remain married for their kids and tell no one about their torture; employees are scared to lose their jobs and keep receiving the torture every day. It's a sad thing really. Some end up killed and only then are their stories revealed.

Here's a true life story as told by Gertrude: "I've been physically struck 3 times at my workplace; once by a cashier and twice by a manager. Yet my store manager did nothing about it. They always talk about me and even to customers calling me names. I want to quit but the pay is good and I really need the money. I want to file a lawsuit but I really don't have much evidence. I'm good at my job, I don't gossip. I don't steal, I try to respect customers and I try not to have non-constructive discussions while on the clock. It's becoming worse daily, I feel very terrible at work and I don't enjoy my work anymore."
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Physical abuse can range from mild actions such as slapping, like Gertrude is being abused at work to severe ones such as the breaking of bones.

Another woman tells her story: "he broke into my house. He was breaking my fingers, to take my daughter out of my arms, that was his way to control me & my other daughter was upstairs. It was late at night and he was going to take her from me because I had taken the children out for dinner, and he didn't know where I was..."

 If you're an employee and you're being slapped by your boss; then he's physically abusing you. You either quit or you file a complaint. Don't be like Gertrude and be miserable at work. It'll start affecting your self-esteem eventually. Your boss has no right to make you feel like that. If you're a wife and you're being abused, run to counsellor or your pastor for help. Don't wait till you end up in a morgue. You can help him get help. Keeping it a secret will not help you neither will it help your perpetuator. If your abuser doesn't get psychological help, then they'll find another victim to abuse.

If you're an abuser, remember that you have an obligation to treat people around you in kindness. Instead of hitting, there are better ways to settle a quarrel. Husbands why hit your wives? Health workers why abuse the patients you swore to care for. As adults why do you abuse the people in your care? Don't forget that in anger, you could do something you'd regret for the rest of your life. You could be locked behind bars & lose your prestige in society.

Prince Pritchett once said, "Change always comes bearing gifts" You'll see the richness change brings if you change. You'd begin to have real relationships with the people you abuse. People will respect you better & you'll become emotionally relaxed. Change always bears gift my friend embrace it & change from your ways.

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