MANAGING ANGER

Anger

Wisdom Nugget: "Sensible people control their temper;they earn respect by overlooking wrongs."

Anger is not a cause. In effect, ask yourself, “why am I angry?” to get to the root of the matter. We often get angry:
(1) When we are hurt, (2) When we feel frustrated and
(3) When we feel threatened.

I learned one lesson from a pussy cat . When you back an animal into a corner, it comes out fighting. People can be the same way. Gentle teasing, personal insecurities, motives-questioned make us feel threatened and consequently, drive us mad. Anger is a choice, we get angry because we choose to. .

The third principle for taming temper is…

3. Resolve your anger quickly. Admit it, Understand it, Deal with it! “do not let the sun go down on your wrath”. That doesn’t mean people in Nome Alaska can be mad for six months straight every year with out dealing with their issues. Don’t finish the day with anger unresolved. Anger metamorphoses into resentment which cannot be justified. Do not prolong or put off settling the score. Do it quickly. Resolve each day’s anger by the end of the day, this is one great principle that should be practiced in every marriage.

**Principle: Never go to bed angry. Don’t cultivate a grudge!

Like the guy who said, “Do you wake up grouchy in the morning?” and another guy replied, “No, I usually let her sleep.”

4. Control your anger
Our hand is on the control knob. Uncontrolled anger can and will ruin your life. Do not let your anger gain control over your thoughts and actions. Guard your heart and thoughts diligently.

HOW DO YOU CONTROL YOUR ANGER?

Just as you learned to cross a street, remember these three words next time you start getting angry.

1.    STOP, and think before you speak. When we get mad we say things we cannot take back. Unringing a bell? "A closed mouth knows no foot. A sharp tongue is the quickest way to cut your own throat. A gentle answer turns away wrath, but harsh words stir up anger".

2.    LOOK at the situation from another point of view. Anger is temporary insanity. More often than not, overlooking wrongs can save one a great deal of trouble in the end. To forbear is divine. "A fool shows his annoyance at once, but a prudent man overlooks an insult".

3.    LISTEN to people with whom you're angry. Most of the time, the people we’re dealing with are hurting and don’t know how to express it. An angry person is a hurting person. Hear each other out.  "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry for man’s anger does not bring about a righteous life." This sums everything up: Man’s anger fails to fix anything.

In a 1994 article, "Wars’ Lethal Leftovers Threaten Europeans," Associated Press reporter Christopher Burns writes: "The bombs of World War II are still killing in Europe. They turn up--and sometimes, blow up--at construction sites, in fishing nets, or on beaches fifty years after the guns fell silent. " Hundreds of tons of explosives are recovered every year in France alone. Thirteen old bombs exploded in France in 1993, killing twelve people and wounding eleven the Interior Ministry said. "Unexploded bombs become more dangerous with time. With the corrosion inside, the weapon becomes more unstable, as the detonator can be exposed."

What is true of lingering bombs is also true of an untamed temper - it can explode when we least expect it. And there will be casualties.

How can I tame my temper?
By admitting my anger, understanding how it works, resolving issues quickly and exercising control.

 weaknesses.